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Some jokes are pretty old… these ones are ancient. They’ve been dried out, covered with salt and wrapped in cloth, just so that they can be perfectly preserved for thousands of years. Come to think of it, perhaps they should be called Mummy Jokes instead.

Why did Ancient Egyptian fish love the desert? They were in d’nile 

What is a mummy’s favourite kind of music? Rap

What did the Pharaoh say to his driver? Toot-and-come-in 

Who conquered all the cheese in Ancient Egypt? Alexander the Grater 

What did the pharaoh say after his tomb was ransacked? I want my mummy! 

Why don’t people use ancient Egyptian drum kits? They have too many cymbals 

What did Ancient Egyptian rulers say when they didn’t get what they want? It’s not Pharaoh! 

Why did all Egyptians wear make up? They wanted to look better than their mummies 

Why did Ancient Egyptians think cats were lucky?  Because they had nine afterlives 

Why did the Egyptian man shave patterns onto his head? He was using hairyglyphics 

Hover over the joke to reveal the answer.

Some jokes are pretty old… these ones are ancient. They’ve been dried out, covered with salt and wrapped in cloth, just so that they can be perfectly preserved for thousands of years. Come to think of it, perhaps they should be called Mummy Jokes instead.

Click on the joke to reveal the answer.

Why did Ancient Egyptian fish love the desert? They were in d’nile 

What is a mummy’s favourite kind of music? Rap 

What did the Pharaoh say to his driver? Toot-and-come-in 

Who conquered all the cheese in Ancient Egypt? Alexander the Grater 

What did the pharaoh say after his tomb was ransacked? I want my mummy! 

Why don’t people use ancient Egyptian drum kits? They have too many cymbals 

What did Ancient Egyptian rulers say when they didn’t get what they want? It’s not Pharaoh! 

Why did all Egyptians wear make up? They wanted to look better than their mummies 

Why did Ancient Egyptians think cats were lucky? Because they had nine afterlives

Why did the Egyptian man shave patterns onto his head? He was using hairyglyphics 

Tom E. Moffatt is glad he doesn’t have to use hieroglyphics to write his books. It would take forever!